Just got back from Choral Soc. (The others are still out watching Schindler's List, hence I am by myself and on the internet..). Having struggled through last term and come close to quitting for a variety of reasons, I'm now really really enjoying it :)

 

We're doing Elgar's 'The Apostles' for a concert in the cathedral in March; and I know that I keep saying this about various pieces but wow. Wow. This music is some of the most beautiful, some of the most magic, some of the darkest, most powerful music that I have ever sung, and I don't think I'm exaggerating too heavily when I say that. It is a huge piece - huge choir, huge orchestra and we will be singing it in Durham Cathedral, a huge, magnificent building with a stunning acoustic! This will kick ass! Actually, I'm trying to persuade Dad to come up and hear it, 'cos he'd love it - the thing is, it's only a week before the end of term, at which point he'll have to come up again anyway to help me with my stuff.. We'll sort something out.

 

I'm considering applying for Secretary, actually. I'm still waiting on an email with details of what exactly the post entails, but I'd much rather go for something like that than a JCR exec position - just 'cos it's more specific, I guess, I don't know - and I'll certainly have more time to do that sort of stuff next year than I will in my third or fourth years when things like dissertations loom large and the Maths get serious.

 

 

It's so nice to be enjoying it now! I think the main problem last term was that I had that permanent cough, which cacked up my throat and meant that I wasn't singing properly. I've still got the remnants, but it's nothing like as bad as it was and I don't feel like I'm constantly straining my voice anymore, which really helps! It's also that last term I had homesickness to deal with, and the whole getting adjusted to university life, so God help the whopping culture shock that was waiting for me when I walked into that first rehearsal. It's not what you'd call a friendly choir, exactly, and the vast majority of people there.. well.. they've either been boy choristers, or have practically lived in their local cathedral on Sundays, and they've certainly been to prep school. Absolutely Christian. And even the one lad I know there from Manchester sounds like he comes from flimmin' Tunbridge Wells..

 

But yeah, it's easier this term :)

 

Nothing like playing about on Maple when you're meant to be doing your Maths hwk :)

 

In all fairness, I was plotting some equations to try and work out whether I really should be getting a volume of minus infinity (I think the integration might have gone wrong somewhere.. although not necessarily, hence the need to try it out.) But then I got distracted, and started typing in some of the other questions to see what they looked like! I thought the first one was pretty cool, but the second...! (They're posted below - silly MSN won't let me put pictures in the middle of an entry)

 

 

(but how cool?!)

 

 

 

We've just looked round the first house!

 

I thought that it was really nice. It's in a good location (10 minutes walk to town/Elvet, 20 minutes to the Science Site, 30 to college, roughly), and it's not too far off the beaten track but not right on a main road either. For me, anyway, location is a big thing, and this one was in a reasonably good place without going extortionate on rent.

 

The house itself has just been refurbished (which is why it was on the DSU website this early - the owner's looking for people to fill it for the rest of this year). Not all of the furniture was in, which made it a little hard to judge, but certainly what furniture there was was of a reasonable standard. Rooms were an OK size - one small bedroom, two medium bedrooms, two whopping bedrooms! The kitchen and living room were pretty small, but hey, it's a student house, it's not going to be palatial (unless you're the far side of Gilesgate), and there was a separate shower in addition to the main bathroom. The advantage of it just having been refurbished, of course, is that things like a new washing machine and double glazing are on the agenda! An internet connection would have to be sorted out.. the most viable solution would appear to be a wireless box.

 

I liked the landlady - instinctively I trusted her, although sometimes I wonder whether I trust too easily. Certainly when I asked her about things like joint contracts and damp in the house and what have you, she didn't shy away from the questions, which is a good sign. Also, she seemed very keen to do everything above board with the DSU - quite frankly, if she hadn't, it'd've be out of the question, although you would not believe the attempted stupidity of some people in college with regard to money-sucking landlords...

 

So first impressions are good! Though all of us definitely want to look round elsewhere, not least for a point of comparison, and we can't sign anything 'til the 12th February, even if we wanted to. We'd need to look round again, this time with a fine-tooth comb, and it would be really good if the others could find somewhere in the same vicinity.. But it does put you in a hopeful frame of mind!

 

It was raining first thing this morning, on and off on my way down to the Science Site for a 9am. From about quarter to ten onwards, it was absolutely vile, hailing and sleeting and disgusting - then very obligingly it cleared up by 11am, so I could get back to college in the dry. Now it's alternately sunny and drizzling, only it's distinctly Durham drizzle, not the type we get at home.. But for three minutes, in the middle of the sleet and the hail, it snowed! Big, proper snow-flakes, and all was magic :)

 

(Though I must admit, I was not impressed by these pictures. We're in the far North of England, dammit, and London beats us to it?!)

 

 

This morning's awakening was, erm, interesting. Although unlike most of college, I was awake when the fire alarm went off at twenty to eight - I was also in the shower, with soaking wet hair. My, was I glad that I'd bought that bathrobe..! Going across to the JKH was COLD, and WET, and COLD!

 

 

I hope to report next time that it's been snowing! I also hope that the fire alarm doesn't go off with such *precise* timing..

 

 

Update: OK, scrap that, an hour and a half later it's started snowing!!!!! Not settling yet, but it's definitely snow!

 

There was blood, there was sweat, there were tears.. but we have sorted out groups for house-hunting!

 

And actually there was neither blood, nor sweat, nor tears of any description. We'd got into a group of nine to be divided up into a five and a four - nine became ten when Annie joined us, and through use of independent adjudicators Stephen and Hayley, writing names on pieces of paper and having 'personal consultations', the groups are sorted, and everyone, we think, is happy. :)

 

It worked really well 'cos everyone could be completely honest, and neither Stephen nor Hayley had any vested interest in who went with who, short of their friends being happy! Certainly I requested a move from my original placing - I didn't want to be in an all-female house, no offence to any of the females I was going to be sharing with - and Eleanor didn't want to be the only girl in hers. So instead of people getting awkward and stroppy about it, I moved from one group to the other, and two problems were solved at once. There are other groups in college who I feel could do with a similar placing method..

 

So I'm going to be looking for houses with Rob, Paul, Max and Eleanor :) Hopefully we'll be near to Rhiannon, Helen, Roz, Pippa and Annie. The hard part, of course, will be finding somewhere, as it's an open market and it gets ridiculously competitive - we're no way out of the woods yet. But it's in control, I feel!

 

 

Update: So I'm going to be looking for houses with Pippa, Paul, Max and Eleanor :) How many times do you reckon that this is going to change before we actually start looking? Argh, friendship politics!! What it boils down to is that none of us know each other quite well enough to be considering living in a house with each other for a year. And my ideal combination isn't going to be the same as Rob's ideal combination or Helen's ideal combination. Come to that, I'm not even sure what my ideal combination is! *is not going to get über stressed-out about the whole business*

 

 

They've had snow in Manchester, I hear.. no such luck further North, though. It's kinda raining/sleeting atm. Today's temperature range is (according to the BBC weather module on Trevs' homepage) -2°C to 5°C. Tomorrow it's set to be -2°C to 1°C.

 

 

 

 

So yeah, Collections, as I was saying. I've just had Calculus, and quite frankly.. well.. I reckon I answered just over half of the paper. Call it 56% for ease of calculation, which it could have been. If I've got three-quarters of that right, I'll score 42% - pass mark, plus one percent score for every hour of revision I put in!

 

Oops.

 

 

Got Programming Collection at 4.15pm. Lecture at 5.15pm, ending quarter past six. Sprint up to college (well, power walk anyway. Damn that Hill.), dump bags, get changed into jeans and t-shirt, gulp down Early Formal that Rhiannon will hopefully have saved for me, then I'm on serving duty at Formal from 7pm. Serving and clearing up until nine+ o'clock in the evening after hundreds of drunk students. Yay. Then I could do some crash revision for Reasoning tomorrow, but I'm sure a shower will be more to the point and I need sleep!!!!! Too tired! Then it's crazy lecture day tomorrow, including said Reasoning Collection in which I look to score about 15%.

 

It's not faaaaair etc., only in this case it actually is, it's just really bad, unfortunate timing!

 

 

It's probably worth it, though, for having had a good day yesterday :) I won't put photos on here, but they will grace Facebook with their presence sometime in the next 48 hours, I'm sure (- I can't be bothered to upload them twice, and more of the people who will want to view them are on Facebook than read this blog). Tomorrow evening, p'haps?

 

Things are going good you'll be glad to hear! (or maybe you won't - maybe you hate me, but taking the chance..)

 

 

I am in love with my new room in college! *warning that Lucy is about to go off on one*

  -- It's quiet - it's not above the TV room, it's not on a through corridor, it's not right next to the bar, and it's not just above the main throughway through college. Better for sleeping, better for working.

  -- It's overlooking the road. I guess that's a tad less secure, but it's not like it's on the ground floor, and I love the fact that it gets traffic noise. People look at me strangely when I say that, but I actually find it kinda comforting - 'cos I'm used to it at home, and 'cos it's a reminder that there's an outside world out there. College can be a bit of a bubble sometimes. It also means that I'm not overlooking anyone or overlooked myself, which I sure was in the last one.

 -- It's bigger, or it feels it anyway. It's certainly fatter, if shorter, which creates a feeling of space.

 -- It's light! :D That was the thing that really got to me in my last room, when I think about it, even during the daytime when it wasn't noisy - there was hardly any natural light (and the electric ones were crappy). It was north-facing, on the inside of a hexagon, and it just got really depressing. Not only is the electricity a bit more efficient in here so I can see what I'm doing when I get dressed in the mornings, my new room's south-facing and not blocked by any other buildings. I was revising at my desk this afternoon, when the clouds shifted and suddenly I was bathed in sunlight! And it does, it really makes a difference!

 

La la la..!

 

 

I'm in the middle of Collections at the minute - short exams in each module. I have to pass them on 40%, but they don't count towards anything, not even the year's total, so they really don't matter in the slightest. They're just annoying, especially as we have to follow a normal lecture timetable in the meantime. Fortunately, though, there are no Maths tutorials this week, the Computing department are humane and have allowed us time off yesterday's lecture and today's two-hour practical to revise/settle in again, and Music have another Reading week. Yes, another!

 

The upshot of which is that I got some decent cramming done for Analysis and Geometry, and those two went all right, particularly Geometry this afternoon (I finished the paper! Woo!). Tomorrow I have off, which is particularly nice timing, and then I'll fail Calculus and Programming on Thursday along with Reasoning on Friday. So that's me sorted!

 

Maybe these exams are a good thing though. For most of this (academic) year so far, I just haven't cared, in the slightest. After seven years of slogging it out at school, I've got to university and it's not that I'm not interested in the courses 'cos I am.. and it's not that I don't want to learn either, because that's the whole point of coming to university in the first place. Just on a day-to-day, week-to-week level, I haven't cared. I've wanted to socialise (better), I've wanted to explore Durham and its surrounds, I've wanted to put in the minimum amount of work to get me by. I've done half the things and carried half the attitudes that most people got out of their systems at school. But this afternoon, in the run-up to and during the Geometry exam, I got a flash of the old Lucy back - maybe, just maybe, if I try hard enough and kick some ass in this exam, I can get 100%. Or if not 100%, do well enough to prove to other people (not to mention myself) that I am good at Maths. I got a real buzz from it. So maybe I can work hard again.

 

(Just not quite yet! 0:-) )

 

I collected my new glasses just now. They are purple!

 

 

That is all.

 

Today the sun came out! The sky was that pale watery blue, with clouds scudding across it - and even the bigger ones sort of lingered rather than closing in menacingly to engulf us in more rain, like they have been doing rather a lot recently.

 

I took a walk down to the local Post Office. It was a bit blowly, but I had my new kagoule on, with the hand-holes (as I call them!), and it just felt so good to be out in the air again, without having to wrestle with umbrellas and soggy trainers! I bought a 10p dolly necklace, one of those ones with the candy beads on, and as I ate it walking back up the hill, the flavours made me feel just like I was back at primary school again! I felt calm, and happy, and home! :) Shame I've got to go away again in a couple of days, but for the first time in a while, I feel like I can cope with it.

 

It's amazing what a difference a bit of sun makes!

 

Ooo ooo, guess what, guess what..

 

Boots! Boots! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

 

 

To translate, I have found some boots that fit, nice boots, and I have bought them! Or rather my mummy has bought them, as a late addition to my Christmas present (- I think she was feeling guilty about buying Rachel a camera, Peter a bicycle and me a kagoule. Or something.. though I did need a kagoule and it is a nice one..). Normal description - long enough, slim enough, dark brown comfy ankle boots, with a chunky, reasonable heel rather than one of those ridiculous spindly 3-inch ones. The only thing is, they do still make me quite tall.. but with that comes better posture, right?!

 

This is the first time in my life (literally) that I have found boots of a fashionable variety to fit. One day, you will understand what this means to me.

 

And yeah, I've gotta learn to walk in them as well. Don't think that they're quite going to be making it to lectures yet (- master a flat surface, and then try Cardiac Hill, eh..)

 

Today was the start of school term again - not that it particularly affects me now, but for my siblings it was back off out again, and for my brother it was his first day at KEFW. He'd been on the Y7 waiting list, having failed the 11+, needless to say, and a place came up. And without going into either my brother's situation or the pros and cons of the grammar school system in great detail, I think it's fair to say that we're all pretty relieved.

 

It's weird though. When he started at secondary school in September it was weird as well, but at least it was elsewhere. Different place, different uniform, different set of issues to deal with. It's not that I want to go back to secondary school as such, but hearing him talk about the same classes, the same teachers, going to the terminus 'cos he and Rachel missed the 18A.. I just can't quite put him in all of the same places that I used to be in! It was certainly a shock to see him come in through the door in that ghastly uniform (- though Rachel's right, it does look better on boys, which is unsurprising considering it was boys that it was designed for. At least he won't be having issues with 'discreet logos' on too-short-skirt waistbands, or tights 'the wrong shade of black'. I mean honestly!).

 

It's going to be quite amusing actually. So far he's been actively telling teachers that he's Rachel's brother (maybe in the hope that they'll give him a pat on the head, I don't know?), but I reckon that he should shut up and see if they work it out. Between us, Rachel and I seem to have notched up a fair amount of infamy in various departments.

 

Well at least I have an excuse to go back for stuff for the next, erm, seven years..! That feels like quite a long time.

 

In an attempt to actually do some work (not to mention avoid my 2500-word summative Music essay. Numerological analysis is obscure. Very.), I've been doing some programming exercises this afternoon. And with no Rob to turn to when things go wrong, never mind a postgrad demonstrator, I have resorted to Googling error messages and clicking on links to coding forums.

 

Coding forums. I am ashamed of myself.

 

Right, will someone explain to me.. what does 'pwned' mean/stand for?

 

It's actually not fair.

 

I was meant to be going to Reading for New Year, meeting up with Rhiannon and Helen (and some of Rhiannon's school friends), for my first ever New Year's party!

 

Needless to say, I didn't go. Instead I was lying in bed, with a high temperature and earache, feeling slightly sick and trying not to have another attack of coughing. I listened to the fireworks going off all around, the occasional flash of light coming in the window.

 

I may be feeling overly sorry for myself right now, but at the minute (by definition, I suppose!), I feel justified. IT'S NOT FAIR.

 

 

Actually I went through the same process a lot in college. I'd be sitting eating breakfast in the dining hall - apparently mechanically spooning Weetabix into my mouth while still half-asleep (I am not a morning person!). Instead, I'd be half listening to the conversations going on around me - such and such a person's birthday party, maybe, the night before at Loveshack or Klute or Walkabout or somewhere; so many units of alcohol consumed, so many people sick, back into college at such an hour.

 

And inside, I'd be getting really, irrationally angry - why aren't you constantly ill, not me? I haven't been up 'til the early hours since the very first night of Freshers' Week; I haven't been wearing pneumonia-inducing tops and short skirts, even when it's above single-figure temperatures outside; I may not have been absolutely teetotal, but my average weekly alcohol consumption has been around a single unit, not the dread-to-think-how-many you've notched up; I've been making an effort with a healthy diet, not binging on takeaways every other week; I've been trying to sleep at nights, in bed hours before most of you (and I'd know, because you crash past my room regularly and noisily). I know that I was being unfair to these perfectly lovely people, and a grumpy cow - that's why I kept these rants to myself, you'll be glad to hear. I know that life isn't fair, and that while I'm sitting here whinging, there are a hell of a lot of people who are a hell of a lot worse off than me. But I am really, really sick of being ill. Not even particularly badly ill - just constant, low-level illness, which is really getting me down.

 

 

I'm going to the doctor tomorrow. Not to ask for any antibiotics as I'm sure it's just (another) virus - and so I should really have lots of fluids, take paracetemol, get a decent amount of sleep.. - but to ask for a blood screening and possibly investigate allergy tests. Worst case scenario would be lactose intolerance, I guess, but I'm at the point where I'd rather have any explanation than none at all. Our immune systems weren't designed to be quite this crap, were they?

 

 

And, erm, Happy New Year..!